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Playing Catch Up

March 1, 2010

I have been avoiding this space.  I think about it every time I read all of your blogs and I can feel my brain squeezing out any desire to come here and write.  Things have been happening, and time marches on and then, suddenly, it is MARCH.  February is over.  So are the Olympics.  I didn’t write anything about the Olympics, and now it is old news.

I am having issues with showing up here and rambling on about, well, nothing.  I am doubting that I have anything of value to add to the great expanse of the internet.  I am lacking motivation and inspiration.  If it makes any difference, I haven’t written in my Writer’s Notebook at all either.  Nothing to say.  But.  I also feel like it becomes a habit to not write just like it becomes a habit to write.  ( I think I just stole that thought from Sam, didn’t I?  Well, it is true.)  Sometimes it takes a whole lot of drivel to find something of value.  So, here I am.  Ready to stop avoiding what is really a responsibility to myself.  I began this blog to chart my exploration.  To navigate into new territory, and into the next phase of my life.  So.  There.

Exciting things have been happening here in this household.  Last week, I got a flat tire.  There was this horrible screeching sound and then I heard the Pppfffffffsssssss….  I, of course, kept driving until we got to our haircut place.  Thank goodness I have had the same hair dresser since I was born and my kids have as well.  She owns the shop and my kids make themselves at home.  I called my knight in shining armor and he came galloping in on his white horse, but something had broken which had popped the tire, and my car had to be towed.  Thank goodness he works so close.  He let me take his car so I could finish out my day.  When I got home, the phone was ringing.  It was my friend telling me that I needed to call the Chair of the Reading Department at the community college where I sent my resume.  I had a little time to freak out, and called my career counselor, made an appointment with her for Friday and then made the phone call.  I left The Chair of the Reading Department a voicemail and then didn’t hear anything.

On Friday, I went to see my counselor.  My topic that I wanted to explore was the ever-exciting topic of–job postings.  She showed me what to Google, and showed me a posting that she had found in preparation for our appointment.  It was at a four year University in St. Paul.  The sister school of the University I graduated from as an undergrad, and in same conference as the University where I got my Master’s degree.  The posting was for an Assistant Professor of Education–Literacy.  Teaching undergrad Education students how to teach reading and writing.  Can you say “Dream Job?” I couldn’t believe it!  In this tight market a job like this is posted?  Wow.

I am under-qualified, of course.  They want somebody who has done “significant work” beyond the master’s degree (I have done, um, none.), and has “demonstrated scholarship” (Um, no publication either.), plus they would prefer someone who has a doctorate.  I am still applying.  Heck, what if there isn’t anyone else who has those qualifications either?  (Hahaha…of course there is….)  No matter what, it is good experience, and it would get my name out there.  This job requires me to get three letters of recommendation (which I have confirmation of two already) that I may need for the community college gig anyway.  Even if I am not quite a fit for this big-wig position, there might be a little position that comes up that I may be a perfect fit.  SAY YES!  It is so exciting that two out of three people have already committed to writing a recommendation for me.  I was nervous asking.  I was also excited to focus on something other than the community college job.  I still hadn’t heard anything.

Until last night.

Sunday Night.  I was reading Mary Poppins to Sarah.  I was not expecting The Chair of the Reading Department to call at that time.  That works in my favor.  I was relaxed, and calm, and confident.  She told me that there are two classes that she wants me to teach, and asked me if I was interested.  Ummmm, YES.  Yes, I am very interested.  I would be teaching incoming freshmen who scored poorly on their entrance exam.  Most score between a 7th to 9th grade reading level.  She said she would get back to me to set up a “meeting” sometime in the next two weeks.  YIKES!

Today began with my letters of recommendation.  Both people asked me to email them with specific information so they could write said recommendation.  I had to do a bit of work for that.  I also had some phone calls to make.  I called a friend whose husband teaches English at the local high school to see if I could call him and grill him ask him questions.  She also referred me to one of her daycare kid’s parents who used to be the Reading Specialist at the high school.  She is going to call me tonight and I am meeting with her on Wednesday.  This is all such good news because I got a phone call this afternoon and I have an interview tomorrow.  Tomorrow.  At 2:00.  Tomorrow.  I, of course, completely flipped out because….TOMORROW.  The Chair of the Reading Department told me that unless I do something “really bad” that I am hired.  And, although I can’t stop smiling, I am scared to death that I am going to do something really bad.  This will be an informal interview, she said 20 minutes, after which we will go and get books and curriculum, and possibly sign a contract.  EEEEEeeeeeekkkkkkkk!

So.  Tomorrow I need to buy a new outfit.  New shoes.  Get my nails done, they look awful.  Shave my legs.  And try to relax, and be myself.  You have no idea how hard that is going to be.  I am so nervous that they are going to ask me specific questions about how to teach big kids.  I have never done it, and I am not articulate at all about Literal Comprehension.  (I will be Googling that tonight.)  My wonderful career counselor tried to reassure a spastic me that they probably won’t ask specific questions.  They will want to get a general sense of who I am and what I would be like in the classroom.  What if I do something really bad?  Okay.  I won’t.  I just won’t.

But, just to be safe, will you send me those powerful good thoughts again?  Prayers are always welcome :)

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8 Comments
  1. March 1, 2010 9:38 pm

    See? You came and wrote anyway… and it’s just how I feel so many days in a row… And reading about your job search…ugh. It’s such a sucky, on the cusp, in limbo time. I know it well.. HUGS to you, lovely friend!

    • March 2, 2010 7:41 pm

      Hugs right back at you! And, yes I did come and write anyway. So, that is a step in the right direction. I am going to try and make the new habit of writing MORE.

  2. March 1, 2010 9:55 pm

    *squeeeeee!* This is so exciting, Meg! I will absolutely be sending you GOOD thoughts and have every confidence that you’ll rock your interview. How great that you have time to get some new pretty clothes and your nails done…but it sounds like they need someone, real bad, right now! You are that person! Can’t wait to read how it all goes.

    • March 2, 2010 7:43 pm

      Oh, thank you Sam! I am so VERY excited!

  3. March 2, 2010 10:48 am

    This sure sounds like Good News to me! It must be so lovely to know going into the interview that they are already planning on hiring you… though a manicure never hurts. :) I’ll look forward to hearing how it all works out.
    As for the question of how much value you add “to the great expanse of the internet,” well… Whenever that thought starts to suck dry my blogging mojo, I try to remind myself that I’m not actually writing for the whole internet — just a small and dear semicircle of it. Clever topics aren’t what give your writing its value; YOU do.

    • March 2, 2010 7:46 pm

      I love how you framed the internet: “just a small and dear semicircle of it.” That is TRUTH looking right back at me. Thank you, that is JUST what I needed to hear. I love that you are in my own little circle, I feel SO BLESSED. xoxo

  4. March 2, 2010 11:56 am

    wow wow wow!!! OMG I am so excited for you!!! Will be sending all good thoughts and YES vibes to the universe!

    I love what Bethany said about not writing for the whole Internet. We’re all that matters and we love what you have to say. I feel like this ALL the freaking time: vapid, banal, trite…BORING. But you know what? It’s all in my head. It’s all in your head. And there is SO much more in your head (and mine…some days). So what if some of it is vapid or banal or trite? Some of it is amazing, thought-provoking, interesting, funny and touching. In fact, a lot of it is.

    • March 2, 2010 7:49 pm

      Liz~ I just can’t believe how much you make me smile. And you are SO RIGHT… YOU ARE ALL THAT MATTERS! It is true! I loved your post tonight by the way…I just keep hearing your words echoing in my brain. You wow me.

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