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Crashing the Party

March 9, 2010

I have been thinking about Blogs since BP stopped writing last year.  When she stopped, I was shocked.  I had completely taken her (and all of the authors of Blogs that I read) for granted.  I was heartbroken, it felt like one of my friends was disappearing.  However, it was impossible that we were friends at all.  I had read her posts for a long time, but I never commented.  I read the comments.  I chuckled along with the conversation.  I never thought I had anything to add that was profound enough to publish.  When she announced that her last post would be the next post she wrote, I felt compelled to tell her how much I would miss her.  It made me think:  What if some of the other authors decided to stop writing?  I decided that I better join in on the conversation in order to let them know how much their words meant to me.   This is where blogging began for me.

Although I began to comment, I still felt silly.  I didn’t know these people.  It seemed like all the other people who commented were good friends, and I felt weird.  I felt like I was walking up to two strangers having a conversation and butting in with my opinion.  It almost felt rude.  But, I did it.  There were a few people who emailed me to thank me for my comment (!).  I was astounded.  What a warm welcome!  And, I found out that authors would reply to comments in their comment section.  It took me a while to figure that out, but then I was hooked.  I always looked to see if there was any response to little old me.  It was sort of like a teacher’s praise to be acknowledged by the author.

(I still feel weird when I comment on a new blog.  When I read Bye, Bye, Pie, I commented because June cracked me up.  But, in the comments there were people having actual conversations.  It seemed to me like I was walking into a party of strangers and just joining in.  I kept expecting somebody to yell out, “Who the hell are you?”  When I actually walk into a party, I am pretty quiet.  I tend to be a bit of a wall flower, unless I am with good friends.  Maybe this is why blogging has stretched me so much.  You have to jump in and take a risk.  Not the easiest thing for me.)

The big jump to actually beginning my own blog was looming for me.  I kept wanting more of the conversation.  My comments were sometimes long, and I was sharing more of myself.  I wanted to become a full fledged member of this party.  So, I did.  And, although I still don’t know if I have anything profound to say, I don’t regret joining.  I like letting my friends know more about me.  I have found out that there are kindred spirits all over the world that I would never have known about.  So, even though I long to be a beautiful word smith, like the many that I read, I have given that up as a prerequisite for blogging.  I am no writer.  I just like to write.  But what I love is the connection that I have made with some of my very own kindred spirits.  These connections would have never been made if I had never decided to crash the party.  I am so glad that I did.

**This post is dedicated to YOU.  You know who you are!  Consider this your very own invitation!**

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9 Comments
  1. March 9, 2010 11:21 am

    You know, the only thing better than having a lovely commenter is having another lovely to blog to read and another lovely person to get to know. It’s funny…when I started blogging I thought it was all about the words. All about writing and crafting an online essay. Now I know it’s so much more than that. It’s about the writing, and the reading and the responses and the relationships. It’s about the community. I’m SO glad you came out to play and that you joined in! (and I’m pretty quiet at parties, too :)

    • March 12, 2010 10:41 pm

      Yes! Relationships! Community! Thanks for welcoming me to this wonderful place :) I *heart* you!

  2. March 11, 2010 8:35 am

    I still feel like I’m crashing the party, and I’ve been blogging since 2002! No matter how open the internet it, it’s easy to feel like an intruder… but I’m so glad I went ahead and intruded on blogs like Liz’s and Sam’s and Christina’s and BP’s. (And I’m so glad all of you intruded on mine as well. :) )

    • March 12, 2010 10:39 pm

      It is one of the best things I have done, to crash your party. Nobody throws a party like you! *smooch*

  3. Jamie Fisher permalink
    March 11, 2010 11:15 pm

    What are things in the internet world called that make them distinct from the face-to-face world? It’s escaping me…but there is a word for it, right? I had jumped to an unexpected level while reading blog posts & comments from certain people. I felt a connection-a “real” link to unknown & unheard & unseen people! I began liking them. Really. And wanting to hang around with them, wanting to connect with them more. (And I a-l-w-a-y-s feel like people are thinking “who the hell are YOU?!” too!) This connection has had a true impact on me. I was at the playground with my boys thinking about what a change these friends (really?!) were having on my life. What a blessing-really. Thanks for your post!!

    • March 12, 2010 10:38 pm

      I am not sure, but are you thinking of the word “virtual?” That is what came to my mind.

      I also have made friends out there in Cyber-Space. People I have only seen on the screen, and I have only read their words. Sometimes, I get the most support from all of my virtual friends. And they have absolutely changed my life in so many profound and positive ways. I don’t know what I would do without them. Even though it doesn’t seem like it, I think that when you read people’s blogs it is an intimate relationship. I vomit out all that I am feeling and thinking here, and many times I haven’t mentioned my feelings to any “real” person. Now, I do censor aspects of my life, of course. But my hopes/dreams/insecurities… they are all here. It is so weird, isn’t it? But it is such a blessing, I agree. And, I am so glad you joined the party!

  4. March 13, 2010 5:46 am

    Did someone say party? You know I am game! haha

  5. March 18, 2010 3:09 pm

    You have said so much here. There is some philosophic phenom called the irrepressibility of problems or trouble: if you douse one problem in one aspect of your life, another will pop up somewhere else. In other words, to keep us just humble enough and empathetic enough to provide for the survival of humanity, there must always be a certain amount of angst in each of our lives. It is a funny concept and believing in it keeps me sane. Reading your post made me think that there must also be an irrepressibility of contact process. As the world shuts down or makes it impossible to have a form of once typical contact, another takes its place. I guess this means that we should not hesitate to keep saying, “Hi!”

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