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A bad day, and a good note

August 12, 2010

Down in the dumps today.

Sarah is “camping out” in the armory tonight, because of all of the potential storms.  She was super excited to go.  I feel bad for her because she won’t have a real campfire to sing around (or roast marshmallows).  She is so tired, I hope she makes it.

The whole work thing is hitting me.  I start MONDAY.  Monday.  I don’t feel ready or qualified.  I really wish I had a friend there to talk to.  I found out today that I will be sharing a cubicle with another teacher.  Not even a reading teacher.  I am not sure what that means.  Does it mean that I can’t leave anything there?  That I can’t really use the computer to store my stuff?  I know it takes away a whole bunch of freedom.  I had planned on assigning a project that used picture books and children, and one of the reasons I wanted to do this was so I would have a reason to listen to my students read.  I was going to have them sign up for a conference so I could do that.  Now, I don’t know if it is feasible.  I have emailed my cube mate, but she hasn’t gotten back to me.  I am feeling so bad that I won’t have my own space.  I never knew that it was a possibility.  It is sort of like a sucker punch.

I am tired.  I have dinner guests coming tomorrow night, and my house is a disaster.  I don’t feel like entertaining.  It might rain as well, which means the kids will have to play in the house.  Never relaxing.

We had to cut our visit to my grandma’s 99th birthday short because I have to work.  I am bummed about that.  And, my mother-in-law is not doing well.  She has diabetes, and dementia.  She goes in streaks.  Right now her diabetes is not in control.  She keeps crashing at night.  My father-in-law told me today that he doesn’t want her to take care of my kids right now because she is so unstable with her sugar levels, which affects her memory.  I count on her to take my kids.  She always begs to have them, she loves it when they are there.  So, I usually use her to do my childcare–win/win, right?  I was totally counting on her to take my kids when I went to work this month.  They don’t start school until after Labor Day.  Now, I don’t know what I am going to do.  All of my babysitters go back to college next week.  I guess I have to inquire about child care on campus.  It is no big deal, it is just one more thing to worry about.  And, I am worried about my mother-in-law too.

Wow.  What an uplifting post!  I bet you are so glad you stopped by!

So I will end on a good note:

We had to go to the picnic at the camp tonight for dinner.  Each group did a skit/song, and every counselor who worked with our children found us, introduced themselves, and told us something nice about our kids.  I have never seen such enthusiastic and fun people in my life!  No wonder why my kids loved being at camp this week.  They are already talking about next year.  It was probably the best “show” that I have ever been to, and that is all because of the counselors.  I can’t wait until next year either!

Did you go to camp?  Or do your kids go to camp?

I did, it was a blast.  I went to both day camp and over-night for a week camp.  How about you?

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9 Comments
  1. August 12, 2010 11:01 pm

    I’m sorry you had a bad day. I don’t know what to make of the shared office space; I know that’s got to be a disappointment. Hopefully you can figure out when the other teacher will need the space and juggle accordingly. Crossing my fingers for you on this!

    As for your MIL…here’s my thoughts. Your kids are all big enough to dial 911, right? I mean, does she drive them around, or do they basically stay at her house and play? Trying to find child care at the last minute is super stressful.(At least, for me it is. I would be like, this is a big effing deal!!) Hoping you find a solution that works for you, but I wonder if the MIL is truly still an option. (And isn’t it just like a man to be like, “Find new childcare! Shouldn’t be a problem! ARGH!) I mean, is he there? Is there enough adult supervision that everyone can be okay for a week or so?

    This is why being blogging friends is rotten. You can’t help out by taking kids off anyone’s hands…which is the most help we need, in this season of our life!

    • August 13, 2010 9:38 pm

      My father-in-law was actually really nice about it. He even offered to take off work so I would have child care. I would never ask him to do that, though. I am sure my kids would be fine at their house, but I think that my mother-in-law feels crappy because she is dipping so far down on her sugar levels. I have my parents and my sister who live in town, so I am not at total loss. I just hate to impose my kids on other people. And for an entire day, I have to be at school from 8 to 4:30. I will figure it out. Don’t you worry :) But, thanks for worrying!

  2. August 13, 2010 5:41 am

    Hang in there! You ARE ready and you ARE more than qualified. You will do great. I am sending you lots of good vibes for your first day on Monday.

    As far as the shared office….it might not be as bad as you think. We have cube sharers here and they have separate computers and little nooks carved out for themselves. The never really cross paths either…

    Sorry to hear about your MIL…my thoughts and prayers are with your family.

    • August 13, 2010 9:40 pm

      Trying to hang in there. I am so happy that you will be sending me the good vibes on Monday. I will need them!

      That is good news about the cube-mates. I was just decorating in my head, so I am bummed. I know it will probably be no big deal at all. I just wasn’t expecting it.

      Thanks for the prayers, she is having such a hard time right now.

  3. August 13, 2010 9:12 am

    Everything will be okay: breathe! breathe! Sorry that you had worrisome stress day…those suck. I agree with Sam, as long as she’s not a direct danger to your kids, I don’t see why your MiL can’t babysit if she wants to and you feel it’s okay.

    I never went to overnight camp, but I did daycamp several times and loved it :)

  4. August 13, 2010 9:42 pm

    I am breathing! I will keep Breathing. Really. DEEP Breaths…

    I bet you would have been a great camp buddy. You would have been one to sing with me, right?

    • August 16, 2010 8:47 am

      Are you kidding? Ask my kids: I never STOP singing :D

  5. August 15, 2010 10:32 pm

    Hm…sharing a cube. Isn’t it those totally unexpected things that have such a big impact? It’s the unexpected part, for sure, because that leads to all those very reasonable questions. BTW I’ve always liked my space & Jamison does, too! He likes his stuff–he always picks something particular to hold in his hand when he goes to bed. Has since he was a toddler–Matchbox car, Lego block, shark, knight, stone. Tonight it was his new lunchbox. A lunchbox in bed. He just loves havin’ his schtuff! He’d take care of your cube issue for ya: ” ‘Skyooze me, this is her airy-yah. Can you move your chair over there? Way over there to that other airy-yah away from this airy-yah? Thank you. That was very teamwork of you.” Hey, maybe try that! XO
    Oh, & only day camp for me. I was too nervous & timid to enjoy anything like CAMP! My brother did the whole sleep over camp thing. Missed us like crazy, wanted to come home, has rich memories & stories because he went. Me? I’m compassionate to others’ fears–try to provide a safe unconditional support while trying to encourage them to push a little beyond their fear. Weird–I’m glad my parents let me do what I was comfortable with, but now know I didn’t experience things that many kids do. Hm…if I could replay all that which road would I prefer to travel knowing what I know now??? (I don’t have an answer!)

    • August 16, 2010 9:10 pm

      I have since learned that EVERYONE shares a cubicle. Who knew? So it is hard to pout about it now, although Jamison’s technique just might work! As for the camp, you just need the right friends to go with you, then they make you feel like you are at home, only it is BETTER!

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